The past and fresh

24th May 2011

Started afresh since 4th May 2011 when fresh oxygen circulates through my lungs. Exhaling the old, problematic TPY estate which I had held in my two bare hands for the past 4 years and 1 month. Old and problematic as it is, but filled with a mixture of good and bad memories and most importantly, customers whom I had served.

Poor families who are truly in need of whatever assistance we abled person can lend a hand. An example which make me keep thanking where I live & how healthy and fortunate I am. I visited an unit (I've forgotten the exact unit or block) belongs to an old man who couldn't walk with ease and see as near or far like I could. Placing my first step on the floor it felt surprisingly chilling. Reason being it is plain concrete finish with weathered surface like the wrinkles on his face. He doesn't have the financial support from kins. Keeping her stomach filled solely on social welfare. Even as my feets were wrapped with sport socks, I still walked with some mental restriction where even tip-toe won't help.

I looked at him with enormous sense of pity which almost hit my tears 'button'. I asked if he need any financial assistance, which I could lend a hand. He rejected me politely and said that he is been assisted by social welfare.

Few weeks later, I met him again that the void deck. Walking face to face, however he does not recognize me this time. Probably memory is failing him. I looked his back view, as he staggered his steps. Nothing much I could offer, except my silent wishes for him.

Now, at where I am. Thankfully, I wasn't just thrown into the deep ocean with a life-jacket. I was slowly guided from 1.2m towards 2m mark, in the swimming pool, before I was release into the ocean. Second thanks is that I not going to handle much residents feedback, or rather, our frontline defence (Call centre) is much more organized and not that pushy as compared to my ex-company.

And due to my job scope, I would not be handling those cases (like the one I have mentioned earlier on) where I do put too much emotion in. Probably I gave things too much thought, and tried doing things that are not within my ability, that causes me to really pause long enough for matters to explode. I not saying I am a saint, just that I felt those pity ones really deserve much much better.

Disregard what I had experienced or experiencing, I shall edge forward slowly and gently on this foreign and unknown path ahead. Wish me all the best.



Writing this entry on 3 separate days with different moods and thoughts really mess up the sequence. Guess I gotta stop here, while I plan for another entry to be drafted within that moment......